7 Tahun Dia

Aku boleh menulis

Aku juga mampu menulis

Segala kerahsiaan resah-resah yang mendatang,

Tetapi, patutkah aku menulis?

Hari-hari sepi tanpa kehadiran kamu

Hanya satu menjadi pengubat rindu

Ya, isi hati kamu

Adakah rahsia?

Aku gila tertanya-tanya

Tetapi, mengertikah kamu?

Mari, aku beritahu satu cerita

Satu rahsia

Cinta itu seperti aku memandang langit

Dengan harapan kamu memandang ke arah yang sama

Di manapun kamu

Masih aku berharap kamu di sisiku

Menikmati keindahan Ilahi yang sama...

Cinta yang sama...

Raikanlah... Lepaskanlah...

-------------------------------

Aku ingin mengajar kamu

Aku cuba mengajar kamu

Tapi kamu masih mentah untuk mengerti

Percayalah aku juga pernah merasai

Sekarang jalan sudah terbuka

Ruang sudah tersedia

Nah, bawakan ini

Aku hadiahkan kamu tinta pena dan nota

Agar pesanku sentiasa menemani kamu

Padamkanlah yang tercela

Kerana aku juga manusia

Bukan aku tak cinta

Pergilah, aku tak mampu mengejar lagi

Bas sudah bergerak, jangan tunggu aku

Tetapi aku tunggu kebahagiaan kamu...


Moga sentiasa terukir
Senyuman di bibirmu...

Tanda kebahagiaan
Yang menenangkan jiwaku...

Lebur

Over the past 48 hours, I've only managed to get roughly 3-4 hours of sleep. It's a problem I've been having intermittently over the past few years. There's no telling which night(s) would be the sleepless one(s) because it seems that they might occur without a warning any given night. Still, I've never had a full-month of sleeping-problem-free since as far as I can remember ; my first sleeping disorder occurred when I was in form 2 or form 3, yes, during secondary school. It had happened for quite some time now and I somehow more or less got used to it already. For one whole week, I might have no trouble sleeping at all. Boom, the next day, Im a night owl. My sleeping problems have affected my memories as well (which might explain the reason I suck at memorizing mathemathical formulas and history lessons. lol). My memories are very inconsistent towards what's happening in my daily life. Due to those sleepless nights, my mind are usually very tired and tends to lose focus quite easily. Thus, limiting/slipped the amount of data stored inside.

Apart from that, my body is also taking its toll from this very problem. Slow response, lethargy, poor eyesight, etc. There are days when I try to keep active and play some hoops but the effect is just so massive  that rendered my body and joints too painful to even play the next day : not really like a 21-year-old.

I don't really know how long this problem would persist, but now I'm seriously considering some sort of sleeping pills to help me out. This has always been so stressful, but I hope one day it will be gone forever.